Sports Lite

Sports Lite. So easy a cave man could do it. Assuming he could turn on the darn laptop. …
Michael Vick is the starter in Philadelphia. Until Kevin Kolb is healthy, of course. Wait, no, after further review, Vick is the starter even if Kolb is healthy. Hey, listen, don’t ask me what Andy Reid is thinking. I don’t know why he made the decision. But I’m pretty sure he made it over a double cheeseburger. …
The Nets reportedly are the front-runners to land Nuggets star Carmelo Anthony. I only mention it because, well, I’ve never seen the words Nets and front-runners in the same sentence. …
Finding career contentment with a bunch of CBA lifers on the shores of the Jersey swamps. Melo, my man, you’ve got a better chance of going one-on-one with Jimmy Hoffa. …
Temple is 3-0 in college football. Meanwhile, BYU was just voted Playboy’s top party school in America. …
Alabama at Arkansas, two teams that don’t particularly care for one another, Saturday in beautiful downtown Fayetteville. Talk about a game for the ages. That’s the biggest story to hit Arkansas since Bill’s multi-tasking cigar. …
Bumper sticker spotted on Braylon Edwards’ car by an alert police officer: If You Can Read This What Does It Say? …
Cubs outfielder Tyler Colvin was hospitalized after a shard from a teammate’s maple bat struck him on the third-base line, puncturing his chest and causing profuse bleeding. In a related story, Frank McCourt’s lawyer got a crack at Jamie on the witness stand the other day. …
Oregon State painted one of its practice fields blue in anticipation of Saturday’s showdown at Boise State. And here I thought blocking and tackling might play a part in the game. …
The 0-2 Vikings are pleading patience from their fans, saying it’s going to take some time for Brett Favre to get out of bed and run the offense. …
 

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Carlos Zambrano announced the other day that he’s going to retire the split second the final two years of his five-year, $91.5-million contract have expired. But just so you know, it’s not about the money. It’s about the love of the game. …
The Twins win the pennant! The Twins win the pennant! It hasn’t happened, of course … yet. Twinkies rule! …
Which reminds me. The Pirates, continuing a proud tradition, will turn a handsome profit this season, enabling them to embark on an aggressive offseason plan aimed at rebuilding the owner’s luxury suite. …
And you wonder why they call the NFL the No Figuring League: The Vikings are in last place in the NFC North and Favre’s backyard touch-football team is in first place in the AFC South. …
The Reds, after receiving permission from the commissioner’s office, honored Pete Rose on the 25-year anniversary of his record-breaking 4,192nd hit. Rose didn’t do interviews or speak directly to the crowd, but he did give a thumbs-up and a wink to a bookie behind the visitor’s dugout. …
That’s it for this week, sports fans. Now that the recession is officially over and all, I’ve got to go buy my wife another Porsche.

Jim Armstrong