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Outrageous National Signing Day Headlines We're Rooting For

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Many believe National Signing Day to be the end of a long, arduous process after months of evaluations, official visits and message-boarding. To me, Signing Day is just the beginning of the process as thousands of new star athletes take the first steps in their collegiate careers by officially picking a school.

Don’t confuse me with a stodgy old man whose crotchety, antiquated beliefs about football lead them to believe that recruiting rankings don’t matter. To win in college football, you must recruit at a high level. But my interest in recruiting begins and ends with team rankings and, of course, the sensational Hollywood-esque horror stories that usually headline National Signing Day.

Be it a legal guardian forging a signature, a recruit accepting a scholarship that doesn’t exist or the use of live animals during an announcement, NSD is always loaded with tales of the weird.

Here are the headlines I’m wishing for on NSD ’15:

No. 1 in the nation will sign his Letter of Intent

Terrelle Pryor, Bryce Brown, Seantrel Henderson and Jadeveon Clowney all refused to sign their letter of intent on National Signing Day. So it could be considered a mild upset when the No. 1 player in the nation in the Class of 2015 boringly inks his name in ordinary and timely fashion. Albany (Ga.) Westover defensive tackle Trent Thompson has been committed to Georgia since mid-August and will sign on Wednesday.

“Strong v. Sumlin” in UFC-Lone Star Match for Kyler Murray

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The bizarre recruitment of talented, do-everything athlete Kyler Murray will finally come to an end when Texas’ Charlie Strong and Texas A&M’s Kevin Sumlin meet in a steel cage UFC bout in Lincoln, Texas, (look it up) for the right to sign the Allen High School quarterback. Sumlin and the Aggies are the favorites to sign Murray (because he said so) but every penny I own would be on Strong in the ring.

Fax Machine Wardrobe Malfunctions

Alabama has their famous Fax Cam Girl. Joy Riddle became famous two years ago for her work as Tennessee’s fax cam girl/lingerie model during Signing Day. So the only logical next step is some sort of wardrobe malfunction a la Janet Jackson. Talk about unexpected entertainment for those staring at Internet video of an outdated office machine for 13 hours on Signing Day. Best bets would be West Virginia, Texas A&M or Florida.

Live alligator ransacks NSD announcement

Living creatures are always a fun addition to Signing Day, just ask Isaiah Crowell and his bulldog puppy. But with three five-star recruits from Florida (a state known for ridiculous behavior concerning live gators) set to announce on NSD, there is bound to be some live animal shenanigans. Either Martez Ivery, Byron Cowart or CeCe Jefferson will use a living baby alligator to commemorate his signing and chaos will ensue. Let’s just hope they don’t bring a baby tiger to the ceremony either or else a bizarre Auburn-Florida recruiting battle will end in bloodshed.

Nation’s top QB decommits because of radio host

Josh Rosen is the No. 1 quarterback prospect in the nation and he’s currently enrolled at UCLA. However, Pac-12 Network and SiriusXM Radio analyst Rick Neuheisel will convince Rosen to decommit and sign elsewhere on NSD (despite it being against NCAA rules). Why? Because Slick Rick wants his son, Jerry Neuheisel, to start at UCLA next season. Overzealous dads and moms always create headlines on Signing Day.

Tom Luginbill will say something he regrets to Mack Brown

...over the value of recruiting rankings - a hot topic of debate this time of year. Clearly, Brown isn't one who believes in recruiting rankings or evaluation of prospects in general. But Luginbill has made his living analyzing and ranking prospects. So on The Mothership's National Signing Day coverage, Luginbill and Brown will get into a verbal sparring match over the value of recruiting rankings. And with Brown's spotty track record of recruiting, the low hanging fruit will be too much for Luginbill to avoid.

Gators finish last in the SEC

Jim McElwain hasn’t exactly scorched the earth since taking over as head coach at Florida. He has one verbal commitment since taking the post with boatloads of five-star talents still left on his board. Yet, if Florida misses on names like Martez Ivey, Byron Cowart and CeCe Jefferson, Florida will do the unthinkable and finish dead last in the SEC in recruiting.

Michigan signs worst class in the Big Ten

Not to be outdone, Jim Harbaugh and the Wolverines will enter Signing Day ranked dead last in the Big Ten in recruiting. Michigan has done better in a shorter period of time than Florida under their new coach but it still hasn’t been good enough to pass recruiting powerhouses like Purdue, Indiana, Minnesota and Northwestern in the B1G ranks.